1990 - Piss Manifesto - Mandie B.

BORRADOR

Texto

HEY! STAND AND DELIVER.... GIRLS - YOU'VE BEEN BRAINWASHED.... IT'S THE MOST PRACTICAL THING TO DO. IT MAKES SENSE. GET YOURSELF ON YOUR FEET AND STAND PROUD AND PISS WITH PRIDE.

WHY SHOULD US GIRLS GET GERMS OFF THE TOILET SEAT? NO WONDER WE GET MORE SPOTS ON OUR ARSE AS WE'RE THE ONES WHO HAVE TO STICK OUR BARE FLESH DOWN THAT GERM-STINK-HOLE. ARRR!

In contemporary western society it is customary that the woman sit or crouch while the erect position is reserved for males. For the woman to urinate she is required to crouch, uncover herself. And therefore hide. Making the procedure of pissing shameful and inconvenient.

"...Her organ is secret, invisible and not to be grasped in the hand. In a sense she has no sex organ. For a boy urinating is much more convenient. The penis can be manipulated, the stream can be directed at will and to a considerable distance."

GIRLS - THE FOLLOWING IS INSTRUCTIONS FOR PISSING STANDING UP:

1 BEFORE STARTING THE PISS

a) Position the feet either side of the toilet.

b) Make sure vagina is directly over the centre of the pan.

2 WARNINGS

a) You may have to pivot that pelvis according to direction and speed of flow. (This will prevent piss from going down the leg).

3 DISADVANTAGES OF TYPES OF CLOTHING WORN

a) Dress and skirts - no problem as long a s the length isn't too long and hippy-like

b) Leggings - good for absorbing drips

c) Jeans - as long as the waist isn't too tight (none of that seventies shit).

FACTS

According to a survey carried out by Cornell University in the USA, men spend an average of 45 seconds using a public toilet. While women take an average of 80 seconds. How the fuck this information was found I just don't know!!

You only need to sit down if you are pregnant, in need of a poo, have blood to mop up or you're bloody tired. So the rest of you can stand - and it's so much quicker.

SO

Go with the directional flow girl. Pin those lips right back whip them knickers down don't worry bout any dribbles or slime trails down your legs. Pelvis thrust out push strong and fast don't worry if you spray at first you'll soon get the hang of it. Have a quick grope while you're there and you'll be sorted.

(For a copy of Urine Trouble, the rude girls pissing standing up zine send three International Reply Coupons to, Mandie B. BM Jed, London, WC1N 3XX, UK)

Contex

As we can read in the book Mind Invaders: A Reader in Psychic Warfare, Cultural Sabotage and Semiotic Terrorism published in 1997 by Stewart Home, Piss Manifesto was released for the first time in Leisure 4 in 1990 (1). Mind Invaders is a compilation of essays and manifestos about the mass media that were wrote by activists, artist and groups (2). The manifesto also was published on the website Alt X (3) and appears on the list of "The Day of the Manifestoes" (4), which is part of the Hybrid Workspace of the Documenta X of Kassel in the year of 1997 (5). Alt-X "Online Network", "Manufactured in Cyberspace", "Where the Digerati Meet the Literati" is a webáge “Made in USA” that was created by Mark Amerika in 1993 with the aim to "challenge the publishing institutions of art and literature by supporting some of the most iconoclastic voices and visions in contemporary art and writing" (6). By the other hand, the Hybrid Workspace was a space dependent on the Documentary X of Kassel in which from June 21 to september 28, 11 groups related with the arts, the Internet and the activism participated with different conferences and workshops, each group had a participation that lasted between 10 and 14 days (7).